More chemo and walking on my own

I’m back at MDA getting a fresh round of sauce. Late Thursday night, I happened to look at my appointment card 📆 from the local doctor's office👨🏼‍⚕️. I’m not sure what happened, but it didn’t have this round of 💉chemo💉 ☢️☣️ on it. With everything going on I can only be 80 percent sure I was scheduled Monday and Tuesday at his office.💉🏨. Well that’s not a very good percentage when we’re talking about my very special cocktail!


I wasn’t completely surprised that either I was confused 🤪or the appointments 📆 were not made.🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️


Still, I have to thank that particular doctor for adding fuel to my inner 🔥🔥. . I was motivated before, but he raised it to another level. 😎 After a lot of begging and convincing Ashley Desormeaux that I could do it (side note: she was half-asleep because it was midnight😎) I talked her into letting me go to MDA 🏨for treatment. ☣️☢️🍹🍸!


When I say let me go, that meant by myself.👱🏻‍♂️🚙 Even though I promised myself that I would follow the MDA 👩🏼‍⚕️doctors' orders of taking my recovery extremely slowly, I feel my progress has been better than I expected. 👍🏻 To everyone else, they looked at me this week like I was crazy! 😂🤪🤪 


I’m a very goal-driven person, and since I literally had to crawl before I could walk again, I lean on my short-term and long-term goals to measure my success. I believe they also keep me from being depressed 😢 or having any pity parties. 😢🎉 This week I believe I made some pretty pretty (insert Larry David voice) great strides in my recovery 😎!!


By Wednesday I was able to get around and walk with zero assistance from anyone or any equipment. Early in the week, if I made a sudden move or did something random my back would tighten up on me and basically freeze me in place until the muscles loosened up. 😬😬 Yes, it's very painful and knocks the breath out of me. 😫😤 I may have strained another rib getting out of bed one morning, but I’m used to that pain so I’m over it. 🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️I managed to drive 🚙 myself to the 😺🏢 office and I spend at least a few hours every day there doing paperwork. ⌨️🖥📄 I’ve had a report 📑out for more than a month 📆 and it’s driving me insane because it’s not finished! 🙄😬 It’s a short-term goal I have clearly failed at this week.🤦🏻‍♂️ 


Like I said before, managing my 💊💊pain meds has played a major role in my ability to be able to drive 🚙 and function like I want and expect to. I only allow myself to take them before bed or if I’m home and done for the day! Any pain felt during the day is controlled by my strength in prayer. 👼🏻🙏🏻 Besides not being able to walk or move around as quickly, I am able to do and go as I please! It’s getting easier every day. 😃😎 Of course my work peeps reminded me all week that I needed to take things slow and didn’t approve of me carrying my man purse 💼👜 around, but it was still a great week!


In my eyes, 👁👁 a road trip to MDA 🏨 by myself was just the next step in reaching my goals. Yes, I made it to MDA 🏨 without incident and will drive myself home today after my second treatment!


I’m so excited and looking forward to seeing what I can do this week. I still believe the back surgery was a game changer in my case. I’m able to bend and reach better than I have in months, 😃😃 not to mention I’m taller, so maybe that helps with the reaching part. 🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️ It’s not all 🌞 sunshine and 🌈 rainbows, though. All the medication 💊💊💉 I’m on has my body pretty jacked up. I basically feel like a swollen, bloated, pot-bellied pig. Not being able to run 👟👟 or work out 🏋🏻‍♀️ doesn’t help those feelings at all. I have to actually pay attention to what I eat 🍽🥣 now, which is ZERO fun☹️ in my book. It could always be worse, thought, so I’m glad that’s all I have to really complain about!


When I was diagnosed, the doctors 👩🏼‍⚕️👩🏼‍⚕️ said I would need help. MDA 🏨has so many programs and support systems just for that. I really had no idea what they meant at the time or when Ash kept telling me how things would be a lot different and we would need a ton of help. They weren’t joking! 😬😬 I never realized or I just refused to accept it, but there are still a lot of physical chores I just can’t do right now, 😡🤨 whether it’s physically dangerous or in some cases it’s the fear of getting sick 🤧🤒 or exposed to someone who is. 😷😷


Again, I have to say THANK YOU to all of our family and friends who have just been amazeballs and rock stars during this time providing so much help. From cutting my grass to picking up C from daycare when Ash works, it’s a humbling experience to see so many people offer so much. 😊😊 God bless each and every one of you!


I also have to take this moment to say THANK YOU to everyone that has worked so hard and dedicated their time and own money to organize and plan future benefits in my name! From t-shirts to raffles, I know the list goes on and on and it truly means the world to me.


This week, my teammates Stuart HendersonChad Booth and Josh Maddox, along with my lieutenant, Bert Hooper, were at an interdiction conference in Denver. I couldn’t go for obvious reasons, 🤣😂 but I wanted to be there so badly and they knew it! Well these guys went behind my back and contacted Doug Wright with the National Criminal Enforcement Association. NCEA is just an awesome organization that I’ve been a proud member of since 2010, so I wasn’t completely surprised to hear that Doug and the association raffled off some guns “I believe” in my benefit! I was absolutely blown away by this act of kindness and the many acts that I’ve experienced since this started. Thanks, guys, for being awesome!


I’ll end this novel with thanking everyone for the continued prayers and support. Again, it’s clearly working, so let’s keep it up. I know this fight is far from over and I need God in my corner 24/7. Thank you!


God bless everyone!


“When life puts you in tough situations, don’t say 'why me" say 'try me!'”